As the end of 2017 approaches, many of us are already thinking ahead into the New Year. As we reflect on the past and want to change in the future, the words “New Years Resolutions” may be flashing inbig, bold letters in our minds. But with half of all resolutions failing, how can we make resolutions that actually stick? Keep reading to help identify and reach your 2018 goals.
The holidays are typically a time of joy and merriment. We are told to cherish loved ones and bask in the “togetherness” of this magical time of year. Advertisements and movies often show families sledding in a snowy scene or gathered around a fire drinking hot cocoa. But not all families will feel such warmth and cheer this year. With the divorce rate at about 40-50%, the concept of “togetherness” can seem near impossible. Divorce, in general, is scary and for those approaching their first holiday season after a separation, those fears are only enhanced. Even though anxieties may run high, it is still possible for families in this circumstance to still have a happy holiday. Here are five tips to help you survive your first holiday after divorce.
How to Avoid Holiday Anxiety with Your Family
Canonsburg native Perry Como was the first to say, “there’s no place like home for the holidays”. For some folks, Christmas vacation includes going someplace warm, but most people in Pittsburgh are trading the sun for relatives this year – because nothing beats Pennsylvania and some homemade pumpkin pie! All families have their quirks and issues, all of which seem amplified during the extravagance of the holidays. Whether your family’s anxiety triggers come from them being dramatic, toxic or loud and a bit crazy, here are a few tips to help you cope, stay sane, and actually enjoy your holiday this year because, for the holidays, you can’t beat home sweet home!
How to Maneuver the Holidays in Recovery
Being in recovery is hard at any time of the year, but as the holidays approach it can seem more impossible than ever. While we’re surrounded by joy and cheer, this time of year also causes the most stress, intense emotions, and fatigue. End of the year demands are daunting and in keeping with the spirit of giving, it’s hard to say “no”. It’s difficult not to feel overwhelmed and over-committed. What’s even more difficult are the feelings of isolation that can ensue on top of everything else. There will be times of strain, but as they say, “failing to prepare is preparing to fail”. Here are a few ways to help avoid relapse and to stay sober during this holiday season.
Postpartum Depression: The Baby Blues
The baby blues include mood swings and feelings of anxiety and sadness that typically emerge 3-5 days after giving birth and dissipate on their own within a few weeks. 70% of new moms experience this temporary change in mood. The baby blues differ from postpartum depression in the length of time in which the symptoms peak as well as the severity of the symptoms.
“There’s societal pressure to feel happy and blissful, so women don’t talk about [the baby blues]. There’s enormous guilt and shame.” – Dr. Samantha Meltzer-Brody
Temper Tantrums: What They Are, What They Mean and How to Manage Them
Temper Tantrums. You’ve been there. A toddler is lying on his back in the middle of the store. He’s screaming at the top of his little lungs and pounding his fists when he didn’t get the Snickers bar in the candy aisle. You’ve heard that child screeching and crying hysterically a few rows back on the plane. Which isn’t great, as you’re already struggling to mentally prepare yourself for Thanksgiving with the in-laws. You’ve seen it. You’ve heard it. And maybe even pitied the humiliated parent who was desperately trying to calm their child mid-meltdown. You might even have been that parent. How confident did you feel in your ability to handle that situation?
“The scars from mental cruelty can be as deep and long-lasting as wounds from punches or slaps but are often not as obvious. In fact, even among women who have experienced violence from a partner, half or more report that the man’s emotional abuse is what is causing them the greatest harm.” ― Lundy Bancroft
Abuse in the dating world is defined as “a pattern of coercive behavior in which one person attempts to control another through threats or actual use of physical violence, sexual assault, and verbal or psychological abuse. These acts may include physical, sexual, verbal, mental or emotional abuse.” (Source: Safe Voices)
Life Transitions – planned and unplanned
What do job change, loss of a loved one, moving, losing valuables in a flood, retirement, pregnancy, and graduating high school all have in common? Drum roll please…they are all LIFE TRANSITIONS! Sounds like a fancy name given to something that is not actually fancy at all? You’re correct! “Life transitions” is a blanket term “we therapy people” give to the personal experience of coming to terms with any change throughout life that causes us to re-invent ourselves in some way. We go through change and transition all the time; some are easy and some are not. A life transition can be expected, like turning 30, or unexpected, like losing your home in a fire.
Five signs your might be married to a controlling husband
Are you concerned that your husband may be controlling? Perhaps you’ve felt this way for a long time, but have found yourself creating excuses for such behavior. Maybe you feel that it’s your fault, or that it’s just the way he is. In fact, you love him. The first step towards finding hope for a better relationship is simply recognizing and becoming aware of some of the signs. Listed below are 5 common indicators of an overbearing spouse who may be attempting to control you:
What is the Gottman Method?
Developed over the course of multiple decades, Dr. John Gottman and his wife Dr. Julie Schwartz Gottman created Gottman Method Couples Therapy to help couples achieve a better sense of understanding, awareness, empathy, and connectedness within their relationships – ultimately assisting them in achieving heightened intimacy and interpersonal growth. Through extensively studying empirical research using real, actual couples, along with years of expertise in clinical practice, this approach to couples counseling is considered both practical and scientific. By combining therapeutic interventions with couples exercises, the Gottman method assists couples in identifying and addressing their personal hindrances to effective communication and bonding.