Codependency or Relationship Addiction
What are symptoms of codependency in relationship?
- Do you keep quiet to avoid arguments?
- Do you feel like a “bad person” when you make a mistake?
- Do you have trouble saying “no” when asked for help?
- Do you have a hard time making decisions?
- Is it hard for you to accept compliments from others?
- Have you been told you are a people pleaser?
Is Codependency for women only?
How do you deal with codependency ?
There are five key things to consider when you are dealing with getting away from codependency and moving back to being soulmates or moving forward to whatever your relationship has in store for you and your partners. These include awareness, detachment, self-care, establishing boundaries and adopting honesty as a core value in your relationship.
First, putting the focus back on oneself. This includes accepting responsibility and ceasing the amount of blame placed on others. This tension is evidenced in arguments, isolation and getting sick. Gaining this new perspective allows for the reduction of anxiety.
Expressing how you really feel can be a difficult concept, that’s why it is common for codependents to lose touch with their feelings. Dysfunctional family patterns encourage the denial of feelings, which can lead to turbulence both emotionally and physically as a result of unexpressed feelings building up over time.
The ability to set and maintain appropriate boundaries is another area of potential dysfunction that is passed through generations. Unhealthy boundaries leads to the prevention of being able to balance on one’s own, which is necessary for healthy relationships.
Honesty is always the best policy. Being honest and open about feelings and the willingness to truly listen to others without demands and expectations is necessary for making and maintaining change.
Genuinely valuing oneself as a unique and important individual is the final strategy to heal from codependency. Self-destructive thoughts results in low-self esteem and self-esteem is greatly affected when an individual is no longer in touch with reality.
Changing these lifelong thoughts and habits isn’t a simple concept. Learning to appreciate yourself isn’t an overnight process. The support of a therapist can help in the confrontation of the core issues and encourage the empowerment needed for a genuinely happy life.
“We are lovable. Even if the most important person in your world rejects you, you are still real, and you are still okay.“― Melody Beattie, “Codependent No More”